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There are plenty of resources at your fingertips including reputable financial blogs and websites that cover various aspects of personal finance from saving money to debt management. Working with a financial adviser is also helpful because these professionals can guide you through a financial hardship. If you never learn the right and wrong ways to manage your money, you'll keep making the same mistakes over and over again.

What To Do When You Lose Everything

Naturally, you want to rebound as quickly as possible and regain what you've lost, but you have to be realistic and patient. By setting unrealistic goals, you're ultimately setting yourself up for failure. After a foreclosure, your plans might include purchasing another home after 12 months. But considering how you'll need to improve your credit score and save money for a down payment, your expectations could be unrealistic, and if you don't attain this goal, you could become discouraged and lose focus.

If you take your time and establish a more realistic time frame for buying another home — perhaps two or three years — you're likely to achieve this goal. No plan is perfect, so even with a solid strategy for bouncing back, you could hit a few roadblocks along the way. The worst thing you can do is give up. Stumbling blocks will happen, and it's not the number of setbacks that matter but rather the number of times you pick yourself up. If you can rebound from every setback, you'll eventually win and reverse the situation.

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2. Change Your Attitude

Wise Bread is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon. About Contact Advertise. Credit Cards Personal Finance. By Mikey Rox on 7 October 0 comments. It was permanence. Things get lost and damaged and destroyed. Even things you love and care about. So instead of having this impossible standard of perfect trust and responsibility for others to live up to, what if instead I expected people and the universe—and most importantly myself—to be what they are: impermanent and perfectly imperfect.

Shit happens. What if instead, I told myself, you lived in a place of acceptance of impermanence. But you can surrender control, and you can surrender this constant disappointment in others. Almost nothing that occurs is actually a problem. Only my reaction to it can be a problem. After all, I will never know at the time whether these changes will ultimately be a good or bad thing for my journey. Even the Princess of Bhutan told me as we discussed the fires that losing all your material possessions is also a chance to start over, to start clean, to be reborn. The next morning, a friend with emergency response credentials managed to reach my house to survey the damage and see if anything could be saved.

She called with incredible news: My place was still standing.

Why Losing it All is Actually a Shortcut to Happiness | FitJoy

My computer, my drives, my research—they were all just fine. My community was decimated. It will likely never be the same. Yet somehow my house had survived. I got to keep my stuff—and keep the lesson I learned from losing it all.

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But with positive control: coming from a place of excitement, teamwork, seeing the strengths in others…. So I can loosen my grip on things.

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Like losing a house. Sounds horrible. But that creates an opening—a vacuum—for not just a new home somewhere else, but all kinds of new people and experiences and growth and opportunity to enter my life. The fires in Malibu still burn as I write this. The wildfire is only about five percent contained, and the winds that spread the fires are picking up again. There are still flames a few dozen yards away from my home. Thank you for all the emails and social media messages of concern during this devastating time for so many people, homes, businesses, and lives. Enjoy weekly wisdom from Neil, along with:.

Thoughts on helplessly watching your community burn to the ground…. A lesson on trust, control, and permanence…. That reared its ugly head by year 3.

How Losing Everything Can Make You Feel Happier, More Peaceful

I mean, they are our protectors, right? By year 5 I was unrecognizable. I faked smiles. I cried a lot. I complained all the time and whined to anyone who would listen.

When All Hope Is Lost Motivational Video !

Oh how I whined. Where did Iva go? That bright eyed bubbly happy go lucky girl that lit up a room with her smile. Where was she? I was downright miserable, depressed and defeated. I was a walking zombie. A shell of a woman with nothing left inside. It was almost time. He built a cute little salon in the house for me so I could work from home.

Anyone who was looking into my world from the outside was certain I had the world by the balls. That I had the life that people only dreamed of. Things were surely going to get better from here on in, right? We were both, finally, relatively successful entrepreneurs. Maybe now, this relationship might actually get better.

Make a “What Not to Do” List

Amazing house, great careers, we traveled, we were comfortable. Not so. It just got worse. So much worse. The house was filled with depression, anger and hurt. Lots of hurt. Perhaps all that negativity was left behind from the previous owners who had recently declared bankruptcy and were both heavy drinkers and smokers? Year 6 had me planning my great escape all the while trying to maintain some sort of composure in a pretend relationship.

A pretend world. A pretend life.

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  6. By the time I had reached this year, my focus was on my why. My why was so big that it practically smacked me upside the head. Easter Sunday of took care of the when for me. After a ridiculously huge frivolous argument by then, those were a common occurrence I had had enough. This was the catalyst. It was time. My nerves were a frazzled mess. My anxiety was through the roof. The time had finally come. I was doing it.