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If you have a bone to pick, you do it in private. Publicly, you have each other's backs.

35 Secrets to Marriage Success

Laughter is a magical, secret weapon. I have found that laughter helps your relationship so much. It helps smooth over arguments and periods of time when you don't like each other. If you can laugh together, can enjoy the same humor, you can get through damn near anything.

Outsourcing can work wonders. This can mean buying a dishwasher, or getting a neighbor kid to mow the lawn for a few bucks. Whatever you pay is probably worth avoiding a marriage full of arguments and resentment over who's turn it is to deal with it. Keep having sex. Keep having fun. If it gets boring and stagnant it can create problems. Keep the intimacy alive, don't let romance die! Or sex!!!

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Otherwise you slide into housemate territory and away from a couple. Pick your battles. Yes, it's annoying to pick up your goddamned socks off the floor, but I'm not perfect either and the bathroom cabinets are full of junk, which annoys you. Neither of us is going to change at this point, obviously. Live with the flaws. It's not that big of a deal.

Go out of your way to make their day. It's no big deal but it lets her know I am listening and I want to make her happy. Don't be afraid to work hard. Work to make things better when times do get tough A successful marriage involves a certain amount of conscious effort. Listen to your spouse's needs.

No matter how well you know your spouse don't dismiss the need to make it clear when something is really important or serious to you Personal priorities evolve over time and both parties can benefit from keeping up with this. I mean, there are big things like sex, careers, and politics, but if I say I want a kitten then I really want a kitten.

Learn to enjoy things on your own. Never stop dating. Even if it's just a lunch date whilst the kids are in school we just had one today! Mix it up once in a while and surprise your spouse. Learn to fight fair. Especially when you argue. Don't be hurtful just to make points. Always remember that you're on the same team. The best advice I have heard is that, during a fight you can either oppose each other, or you can work together to oppose the problem that is separating you. If you always see yourself as a team , it makes a huge difference in how you fight.

35 Secrets to Marriage Success | Marriage | Marriage tips, Marriage, Love, marriage

Establish common goals and strive to attain them together. Sometimes, spouses just need vent. Let them! If you're a husband, don't feel like you have to fix every problem your wife wants to talk about. Sometimes she just wants to vent or voice her concerns, and only wants you to listen and tell her you understand.

Dr. Phil’s Secret to a Happy Marriage

If you expect a better, more satisfying relationship, you improve your chances of having one. Today marriage has become a two person cocoon that we expect to get all our support and intimacy from. Keep friends and family in the loop. Your marriage should be your primary relationship — not your only one. Coontz thinks all this togetherness is not necessarily good for couples. The way to strengthen a marriage, she argues, is to put fewer emotional demands on spouses.

It just means that married couples have a lot to gain by fostering their relationships with family members and friends. Happiness lies within the individual and expecting a spouse to change that forever is unrealistic and unfair. What is surprising is that research shows happiness is relatively stable.


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Over the course of a marriage, desire can lessen. Despite this, sex is healthy and has all kinds of biological and emotional benefits that should not be ignored. Over time, regular sex can improve your mood, make you more patient, damp down anger, and lead to a better, more contented relationship. Looking to heat it up? After ten weeks, the couples again took tests to gauge the quality of their relationships.

Avoid old habits and make plans to do something fresh and different once a week.