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Their enthusiastic encouragement was valuable support for my budding ideas.

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By listening to the professsionals in the workshop, I also realized that many of us had individually made the same discovery: many of the Adult Children of Alcoholics ACA concepts also fit dysfunctional Christian families except the crossover breaks down when there is no alcohol involved. Although the ACA ideas were helpful, there was an incomplete fit between the two sets of dynamics. Nevertheless, we had begun to notice a syndrome of behavior that was peculiar to Adult Children of Evangelicals in a way that certain behaviors were peculiar to Adult Children of Alcoholics.

As the congress progressed, I listened, watched, talked, and tried to learn as much as I could about the issues that Christians and Christian counselors were facing. The air was filled with talk about dysfunctional homes, physical abuse, sexual abuse, co-dependence, drug abuse, and so on. The book tables were covered with books on these same topics. It gradually occurred to me that a modified version of the three alcoholic rules Don't Talk, Don't Trust, and Don't Feel could serve as a model for understanding the dysfunctional evangelical Christian home and the problems that Christian counselors were seeing in the lives of struggling Christians.

As I was pondering all of this in Atlanta, the evangelical version of the three alcoholic rules and their unique ability to create an emotional split in people suddenly flashed in my mind. I have used the alcoholic model of dysfunction as a jumping off point for the evangelical version of the three rules since many lay people as well as professional therapists are already familiar with the ACA concepts.

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The phrase, "Adult Children of. Although the dynamics that produce ACEs are fertile soil for co-dependent behaviors to develop, not all ACEs are going to be co-dependent. If you are not familiar with the ACA concepts and rules, enough material is provided to give you a basic idea of their meaning. Before we go any further, let me also explain what I mean by Evangelical.

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  • Historically and theologically, the term has been used to describe Christians who emphasize the importance of personally embracing the Gospel. In spite of other theological differences, the emphasis on personal experience is the common denominator that has defined the evangelical identity. This traditional definition certainly applies to the concepts being discussed here. Through the years of working with people from varied denominations, however, I have discovered that these ACE conflicts are not the exclusive property of evangelicals.

    Christians from denominations who resist the evangelical label also experience similar struggles and problems. In fact, any legalistic religious belief system that emphasizes control and personal stifling is going to create the climate for personal repression. Since there are also wide differences among congregations across the same denomination due to the pastor's emphasis or the community's local culture, some churches may or may not fit the qualities described in this book.

    The critical component that results in the problems under discussion here is the rule-based approach to the Christian life, and although I realize there are churches and groups of believers who do not emphasize this type of Christian system, there are many who do. In light of this, I am using "Evangelical" loosely as a broad brush term to cover general Christendom and those who take the Bible's teachings seriously.

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    This includes the major denominations as well as the independent churches, and the Calvinists as well as the Armenians and the Catholics. The term "Fundamental" is too restrictive since there are many Christians who do not identify with the Fundamentalist movement, but evidence the disorder under discussion here.

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    Not everyone fits the historical evangelical definition, either, but it seems to be more adequate than other terms that are available. It is my hope and prayer that this book will fill the niche that exists betwen the ACA concepts and the evangelical dysfunctional family as we all work together as Christians in striving toward the true holiness and wholeness that God intends for us. Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.

    Want to Read saving…. Verily, now dry your tears and bow yourself down gratefully. He is alive!

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    You can happily agree that. His understanding is infinite. The LORD is good to all. His tender mercies are over all his works. Praise the LORD! An evil man is trapped by sinfulness of lips, but the righteous shall come out of trouble. Share your thoughts with other customers. Write a customer review.

    Growing Up Holy & Wholly

    Read reviews that mention diane wilson gulf coast drag quit knock drag loving a blue-eyed quit loving shrimp boat snake handlers blue-eyed jesus young girl church of knock blue collar speaking in tongues growing up in the church rural texas roller growing holy rollers little girl reading this book memoir.

    Showing of 26 reviews. Top Reviews Most recent Top Reviews. There was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later. Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase. Gather the likes of Garrison Keillor, Molly Ivins, Clyde Edgerton, Mark Twain, and the next evangelical bible-thumping missionary who appears at your door--and you'll have Diane Wilson in all her rollicking, metaphor-bustin' glory. Wilson speaks a down-home language that--once ye've developed an ear for it--will speak to your heart, true and pure, and you'll want her to go on speaking and writing in her sweet, sassy, honest voice.

    She's that rare, as a person and writer. Here's hoping you'll give us a third book, Diane Wilson, about your teenage years and early adulthood, which would surely be quite as spectacular as this one. Good delivery in good shape but I don't care for the author's writing - totally about religion and her hangups. There is a certain amount of pleasure to had in reading stories of people your mother told you not to associate with--and writer Diane Wilson serves it up in a heaping helping with her portrait of her hard-scrabble childhood, complete with itenerant preachers, junked cars, and irate grandmothers.

    But in truth the stories aren't the main attraction here: its the tone of voice, which is witty, idiomatic, and distinctly wry, tossing off memorable turns of phrase with tremendous authority and aplomb. Drawn from memories of her childhood, the central stories concern revolve around a struggle in the family's church--a struggle that leaves an opening for the so-called Rev. Dynamite, who steps in with a call to repentence.

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    • Unfortunately, the Reverend's church is of the "Written In Heaven" variety, a phrase that usually denotes snake handling; when he is bounced out of one church, he sets up his own on the edge of a misquito-ridden swamp. At the same time, one shrimper has been killed and another has gone missing; not only does Diane become involved in the search for the killer, she also gets involved with the snake handlers too.

      It may be difficult for mainstream Christians and Americans to believe that such sects exist, but they do indeed--and while Wilson doesn't attack them per se, neither does she make them seem less unsavory than they actually are, laying it on the line in no uncertain terms. As for the murder, it proves a largely unresolveable affair, but the pleasure is in the journey and the way Wilson writes it. GFT, Amazon Reviewer. Shake my family tree and numerous holy rollin' preachers, - and preachers' wives, missionaries, and plenty of acting out preachers' kids -a few snake handlers, and plenty of back sliders will fall out.

      That's one of the reasons why I recognized so much in Wilson's wacky, seemingly implausible but, trust me, it isn't memoir. This is a book that requires you to sit back with a glass of tea, turn off your brain, and just enjoy. There aren't deep revelations here. Wilson's childhood can be described as chaotic, but filled with love. Her relationship with Chief, her paternal grandfather, is touching, and the family members, neighbors, visiting missionaries, and shrimpers that populate her memories are interesting and somewhat crazy and somehow believable.

      Wilson introduces readers unfamiliar with the holy rollin' life to the wonders of speaking in tongues, rogue snake handlers, and people whose faith is unshakable even in the face of contrary "evidence. This is a fun, touching little book, and although there are no deep secrets revealed, I enjoyed reading about Wilson's experiences in her church and community and especially within her unique family.

      Holy Moe talks growing up in Park Hill on Staten Island